Yoga: Break out of your conditioning and live pain free

FreeThis morning when I came off my mat, for some reason I was overwhelmed by the realisation at how much control the government exerts over us through money. A month ago my situation was quite different as I was working a care job in addition to teaching my yoga classes which left me with more than enough money to live on. I took the risk of going on holiday and when I returned, I had to move house and the work was pulled from under me as disability benefits continue to be cut.

I am in a situation at the moment where being self employed is extremely unstable and quite frankly scary as resources are tight for everyone. My finances change significantly from one week to the next and in the field in which I work, many are leaving their jobs in the evening so stressed and tired that they would prefer to buy a bottle of wine over spending money on a yoga class, not realising the value of their own healing.

All the time that big corporations and banks continue running, large numbers of people are locked into them, fearing that they will not be able to survive financially any other way than by working for them. When I went into the bank yesterday, I wondered how the woman behind the reception desk lives with herself when she must have people like me coming in every day, close to tears because they’ve been told they’re going to be charged for the joy of having an account (£15) when they’ve only got £30 to their name and they are living on less than £100 a week. I realised it was because she was doing what she thought she had to in order to survive and it is this global consciousness which has lead to a world of lemmings in which the rich and powerful control the poor. Once upon a time, religion was the dominating force of the totalitarian state. These days, it’s debt and the inland revenue.

I have friends who are scared to move jobs or leave London because they are too afraid that they won’t be able to keep making the repayments on their credit cards. It stops people from doing everything from having children to moving around and leaving the country. Yet really, it’s an illusion. At the end of the day, if you ever reach a point where you can’t pay it back – what the hell can they do? My brother is one such example spending many years suffering from deep depression intensified by the constant calls from debt agencies and the like who harrassed and drove fear into his heart until one day he snapped and told them all to just “fuck off!”

In working for myself, for the most part, I don’t earn enough to pay tax at the moment. I am starting out so not making enough money but if I were paying tax right now, I don’t think I could live with myself knowing that it is going to a government that is actually killing people. What people appear to fail to realise is that, control can only be yielded if we allow it. If everyone quit their jobs/striked what do you think would happen? Do you think we’d sit around starving and cold or do you think we’d pull together and kick out this appalling Government. I’m sure there’d be a level of chaos but I know for a fact that there are plenty of people out there who love a bit of organisation and would soon step up to the mark. The kind of people that should be running the show but don’t like the idea of being in the spotlight. What we need is anarchy.

At this point, the easiest thing for me to do for my own ‘safety’ would be to surrender. To get a job in a care agency – a name at once misleading for an organisation that cares nothing for its clients and everything for the profit that they bring. I haven’t made it this far to give up and leave my principles at the door. Care agencies are notorious for providing for the personal care needs of clients and providing no other support. They have a tendency to treat people like objects and are certainly not known for their sensitivity to individual needs and personalities. Alternatively, an option could be to try and find any old job to make ends meet but I know that road and that road leads only to desolation. The fact is that whether we are working or not, whether we have money or not, there are always ups and downs in life and if we can’t learn to feel gratitude for the essential things we have, we can only but battle with ourselves.

So this morning, when I got up, I’ll admit the tears began to rise and then I thought to myself, come on Nicola, you can do it. Stick to your guns and give thanks for the hot water in the shower and the food in your fridge. Trust that as long as the greater good is at the heart of all that you do, the universe will provide and I reminded myself of the fact that I’ve so far this week had three free dinners and countless cups of coffee and juice from the chef and people I hardly know in the local pub who trip over themselves to help, “Cos you’re a lovely person,” (or at least that’s what they said).

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